INs AND OUTs — SUMMER HOSTING EDITION

All my rules and favorite things for making the most of being a summer host

Jul 09, 2025

Wearstlerworld,

I love hosting, and that’s really a year-round pursuit. But, in summer? The energy is just something different: it’s slow, long days, and energized nights. (A little bit of a reverse from winter, in that way.) And it requires it’s own different attention to detail – one that prefers the informal (IN: the high-low of caviar with potato chips), over the rigid (OUT: starched linens!). There are no real rules here. There’s just light, texture, tension, and whatever happens in between. Hosting, like design, is just another way to say something without speaking.

This week: the INs and OUTs of good summer hosting, whether you should keep your shoes on or not, and what to bring as a guest (instead of wine). But first, a few of my biggest, overarching hosting tips that aren’t just for summer:

MIX. A table should be built on contrast – hard and soft, rough and refined, something vintage next to something that’s never been used. That’s where the magic lies
THINK. Consider small moments. On a table, the right salt dish becomes sculpture (a good reason to collect things like candle holders, small dishes, and great glassware)
LIMIT. Master the social mix. Six to ten guests is ideal – perfect for conversations and connections, without losing intimacy

These are a great baseline for a rich, layered, memorable day, in my opinion.

If, for summer, you prefer to get away, check out my Travel Ins and Outs, and my guides to summer destinations: Ibiza and Biarritz.

HOW TO: INVITE

When you’re inviting people over in the summer, you want to minimize formalities and restrictions, and maximize vibe. And so, dress codes are strictly out. That’s just one tool to communicate what sort of party you’re going for.

What’s in, instead, is sending out invites with a short playlist. It can get everyone in the right mood, and can say a lot about what your guests can expect. (Upbeat? Mellow? Loose and meandering? Or, to an almost-theme?)

And without further ado:

DO YOU?: SHOE

There have been times when I get to a party, only to be informed there’s No Shoe policy – and, frankly, it’s my worst nightmare. I do love being barefoot, but sometimes the nixing of a shoe can ruin a look.

To me, it should be up to the guest what they prefer. Where do you stand?:

(And this has reminded me, I did a whole post on the foot and what goes on and under it, for Wearstlerworld: read it here.)

THE GREAT OUTDOORS

Dining outdoors doesn’t mean you need to drop the sophistication level, even if it’s something casual and laid back. No pink flamingos or Tiki torches. Instead, think about a mood – soft curves, woods and leathers, and even silver (that will reflect the sky and trees!) all add to a grounded energy. Then, you can play with contrasts: simple versus ornate, new versus old, or delicate versus robust.

1. Georg Jensen Water Jug

2. Loro Piana Boules Set

3. Artefacto Gold Server Set

4. Zuma Champagne Coupe

5. Lobmeyr Crystal Vase

6. Ipuji Grey Maple Three Leg Stool

7. Ettore Sottsass for Alessi Grinder

8. Victrola Turntable

9. Christofle Caviar Serving Set

The best things on the table are story-tellers. They are curious pieces that might not seem to fit, they are special treasures and gifts from friends, and one of mine: some of the ton of silver that we inherited when we purchased this house from the Broccoli family – some which still had their Sotheby’s auction tags.

And, for the invitees… HOW TO GIFT A HOST

Here are are my top three gifts for hosts, if you’re thinking about something other than wine (and you should think about something other than wine!).

Flamingo Estate spicy olive oil (I’ve been using it every day for weeks!)
A tiny dish, for nothing and everything
A vintage book from my collection, with a note and a personal stamp

I buy things at flea markets without a specific person in mind, but knowing they’d be great gifts. Perfect excuse to buy something you love, and you’ll find a home for it. I have a little gifts closet – because even for a last-minute party invite, you want to be prepared.

But, after all this, what I love most about hosting are the moments you don’t plan for. The way light hits a glass. The silence after someone says something true. That’s the good part.

So, happy hosting this summer, and let me know what you think are IN and OUT.